Bitter Sweet

How many of you know that ‘bitter sweet’ isn’t really sweet at all! We have all done it but what about when we hold on to it?  What happens when we don’t let things go and forgive others?  Can it actually tear down our physical body?

Bitterness comes from many sources but mainly it comes from when someone does you wrong or someone calls you out and you are not ready to receive correction.  Are you harboring the pain they caused you or perhaps holding on to something they did to you when you were younger? Situations like is not about what they did…no not at all!  It is how you respond. The emotional pain is hard to let go but God expects us to forgive.

I can recall times in my life growing in my walk with the Lord and I thought ‘Wow, I’m really doing right by His word!’  Then I realized the truth (the Holy Spirit prompted me).  In prayer I had asked the Lord to reveal to me the issues of my heart and that if anything is not right in it that He would show me. Immediately He had shown me some things I had put in the back of my mind.  Stuff from high school that  I had held with a death grip and even inside my family!  You see when refining gold you have to place it in heat.  The heat is the rough times in life.   To become refined we have to endure troubled times. It is in those times, the Lord or the devil can take the glory.  It is not when we are doing well and things are going great that we are getting stronger.  The times of trial and our reaction to it is what strengthens us.  Jesse Duplantis calls it ‘strengthening our moral muscles’.  I love that because it is so true!

When I was faced with the bitterness of my past, through prayer, I immediately asked the Lord to forgive me.   I was wishing pain on the other person and forgot to realize the grace God has so graciously poured on me.  I forgot that He loves that person too.  You can have everything in the world, but if you lack love…you have nothing.  In the world’s eye what I was upset about was rightfully appropriate and even taking revenge would be sufficient.  But what does that profit me? What does it profit God?  Any man can love those who love him and hate those who hate him!

God has called us to something a natural minded person would think impossible!  We are soldiers waiting for his call!

So how can we possibly let it go in forgiveness?  Well God has called us to pray for our enemies and bless those who curse us.  What?!  That’s right!  Bless them.  When you hold on to bitterness you are blocking God from being the rightful judge.  He loves us…here’s the kicker…He loves them just as much!  And what does He do to those He loves?  He chastens them!

We have all experienced pain, hurt and the common insensitivity of others.  But God does not want us to act or speak based on negative emotions. He wants His word to be in control and you as a submissive vessel to allow His word to be the way you govern your life. When you allow emotions to take control, you are allowing the emotions to be crowned the god of your life.  In this act you are trying to find the blessing that can only be given by God through and ungodly way.  And God cannot and will not bless sin.

The Unfortunate Outcome

Bitterness can create all sorts of havoc such as:

• A divide in relationships
• Physical pain
• Loss of communication
• Anger
• Depression or sadness

Physical Implications

The link between unforgiveness and cancer has been discovered by doctors. Dr. Don Colbert’s book, What You Don’t Know May Be Killing You, draws a connection between harboring unforgiveness, bitterness, anger, fear, resentment and physical disease. He says that deadly emotions can “wreak havoc on our physical bodies” even to the point of preventing the body from releasing toxins from the gallbladder and liver. Dr. Colbert notes, “The excessive stress caused by negative emotions is quite dangerous because it increases our cortisol levels, which then suppresses the immune system. When the immune system is suppressed, cancerous cells begin to form and grow. Holding a grudge, for example, is the act of holding an emotion which, if not released, increases the body’s negative stress level. This affects the blood pressure, adrenaline levels and increases the risk of heart disease.”

So you see, it is like drinking poison and hoping the other person death!  Bitterness is poison.  I found that through much of the time I spent without the Lord, I was using what other people had done wrong to me as my motivator.  How silly is that?!

Forgiveness

• Forgiveness is not an emotion it is a decision.  This decision can only be made by you.
• Begin the healing process and allow God to remain in the drivers seat.
• Pray for those who do you wrong
• Don’t make excuses for being hurt right or wrong
• Don’t wear your emotions on your sleeve by bringing it up all the time-release it to your Father and let it go!
• Do not take revenge in your own hands
• Remember what the Lord has done for you on the cross and in your life
• Bless those that curse you.

The Motivation of Fear

If you are motivated in fear you have a door wide open for the evil one.  We are not to respond to anything in fear, that’s how we allow satan to gain a stronghold.  If we are motivated by anything other than love we are setting ourselves up for failure.  I remember when I asked the  Lord to continue searching my heart I had made a request to make it possible to run into anyone on the net or in person that once hurt me or that I hurt.  I would take the opportunity to apologize (even if I was right).  Now what they do with that information is completely up to them.  They can take it or leave it and I will love them regardless.  My job is to do what is right.

After this I stayed in prayer for those who are on the other end of a burnt bridge.  I ask that they are blessed by the Lord and that they find people in their lives that love the Lord.  Through this, our hearts become healed.  Through this action of faith we begin to be motivated by love and not fear.  The desires of our hearts are blessed and the Lord can rule and reign in all areas.  Everything we think, say and do need to be checked by God’s love daily so we don’t wrap ourselves in the bondage Christ set us free from.

We are called to love the good, bad and ugly!  Unfortunately, many believers are in a state of disobedience because their decision to love is based on emotions or whether their love is returned.  It profits nothing if you only love those who are doing you right or stroking your ego.  Many fail to walk in love because they believe it is impossible, but God will never tell you to do something you do not have the capacity to accomplish.  Remember He walked this earth and has gone through everything we have gone through…even to the cross He walked in love.  Now this walk can only be accomplished if you have accepted Christ into your heart because this strength only can come from the Lord.  I wouldn’t expect a natural minded man to walk in the spirit.

When you have this love, you have control over emotions.  You can love them despite the evil they inflict on you.  Perfect love does not get offended.  When your love becomes more and more refined, things that you might have once blew up at becomes a reason to love more.  This happens because you know who your Father is, you know who you are to Him, you know that He loves them as much as He loves you, and you know if you want someone else to change you have to give it to Him.  He fights the battles for us in a more surgical way and it can only be set in motion when you act in love from the inside out.

Be blessed on this beautiful day in which we are blessed to enjoy!  Really think in your heart and ask the Lord to reveal if there be anything that is not right that He reveal it to you.  Make the decision to allow Him to work on others and you take control of what you can, and that is your own heart.

When I had said ‘…doing right by His word’  I mean to think about what the Word means. John 1:1 In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God… John 1:14 The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us…  Are you doing right by the word, by His flesh…which is Jesus Christ?  It is Him who laid down His life for us, He died for you just as much as He died for your enemy.  He did not say ‘ Lord I will die for them but I’m holding on to the bitterness, I will forgive but not forget’ NO! He loved those who persecuted them! It is precisely when He said ‘Forgive them, for they know not what they do”  that His love surpassed anything mankind has known to be natural!  He is supernatural!  Do right by the Word that became flesh and lay down your life, sacrifice your flesh, the flesh that wants to take revenge.

^{Ephesians 6:12} For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age,against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.

If you have not received Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour, pray this with me and mean it from your heart:

Dear God, I come to you in the name of Jesus Christ. I come to you with all the sins I’ve committed. I admit I am a sinner. I ask for your forgiveness. Please cleanse my body, soul and spirit from all this sin with the precious blood of your Son Jesus Christ. I believe your Son Jesus Christ died on the cross for MY sins and all those that believe in His name. I also believe that he rose from the dead so that I, too, may have victory over the works of the devil. I confess and accept Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior and ask him to come into my heart and give me a new life that’s after your will and purposes. I want to serve you and obey all your ways. I want to live for you every day of my life. Please lead and guide me by your Holy Spirit into righteousness. Thank you Lord, for the work of your Son Jesus Christ shedding his blood for me and for hearing and answering my prayer. I’m now considered your child through the work of your Son Jesus. I have been born anew and by faith I believe it. In Jesus’ name, I pray. Amen.

WELCOME TO THE FAMILY!!! I am so blessed to know we will be neighbors in heaven! I strongly suggest you get into a bible believing church that edifies you in your walk as well as getting a bible and getting the word into your heart. Don’t expect this life to be easier now that you have Jesus. In fact the devil will be working harder now that you are claiming the name of Jesus. Don’t be weary for we fight a good fight and Jesus has already conquered the grave. Greater is He that is in us than he who is in the world!

If you are every in the OC on Thursdays join my husband and I for bible study in Irvine! http://www.harvest.org/events/oc/ Hope to see you soon!

Personal note: Today the Lord has blessed me through the net to reconnect with those I hurt and those who hurt me.  I am blessed to be able to take the opportunity to apologize no matter the situation.  Some have gratefully accepted and some have no longer responded, but that is up to them and it is not my duty to make them see anything but love.  My wrongs are now right with the Lord.  Why bring up what God has chose to forget?  Our God is so amazing!  You can’t make someone carry a relationship with you…but you can love them from a distance and pray blessings on their life!  Have a blessed day!

God Bless~Melissa Leslie-Quinones